Reflection 74 – It’s Not ALL About Me!

“It’s not me, it’s not me! It’s my bodyguard!!”
This statement was said by the late Whitney Houston in her closing scenes in the infamous 1992 movie The Bodyguard starring Kevin Costner. This came when someone tried to assassinate her while receiving an award on stage, and she was only saved because her bodyguard ran towards her taking the shot instead of her. Amid this chaotic scene, everyone’s attention was on her fearing that she would be dead (since she is the star!). So, she needed to make this statement to deflect the attention away from her. This scene came to my mind as I encountered the following situation.
Around two weeks ago, I came to know a lady through my FB page whose mom has ALS. She was happy to read my reflections that gave her some emotional boost and gave her some sort of “togetherness” that she wasn‘t alone in that fight with her mother dealing with this debilitating disease. As we exchanged some medical tips about her mom’s health, something important struck me! Not that I didn‘t know it before, but I became more aware of it as we talked.
Usually, whenever a tough calamity hits someone, most of the attention and support gets automatically channeled to that person; and this is of course something great. However, in doing so, we easily forget about those around that person. What about the spouse, parents, kids, and so on?! Typically, when a calamity hits, support and concern flow to everyone involved in that event. However, as time passes and people get busy with their own lives, it could start to dwindle until it might slowly vanish in some cases! But even if it remains, it‘s usually focused on the inflicted person and not the caregivers around them. Those caregivers whether it‘s a spouse, daughter, parents are left to struggle alone unfortunately. The problem is not many people are aware of those caregivers’ struggles because they are simply not the “stars” of the event. My experience with ALS taught me the following.
As human beings, we get busy, and we forget. We should pay attention to various cases especially if it‘s an ongoing issue such as a terminal illness or an ongoing financial difficulty or what have you. We should seek to know what would make the lives of such people easier by simply asking them 😊. Sometimes, people would love to help-but in their own ways- not in the way those in need would like! It is essential to be in touch with others going through a similar experience. Sharing your story with people who can relate to you makes a huge difference and produces a necessary emotional boost.
I hope by shedding some light on this issue to have people look for others, who need such help but might be shy to openly ask for it.