Reflection 18 – How ALS Taught Me Living The NOW Moment

Most human beings are usually caught between two opposing feelings. On the one hand, we dwell on our pasts due to what we have missed out on or for unpleasant events we have experienced; on the other hand, we anxiously await our future fearing what is coming next. In doing so, we basically fail or forget to live the present. In fact, psychologist Daniel Levitin in his book The Organized Mind cites this trait as being the most significant one pertaining to successful politicians, Fortune 500 CEOs, athletes, and rock stars. The legendary Michael Jordan also encompassed this feature; the ability to exclusively focus and enjoy the NOW moment. But as they say, many things are easier said than done.
Living with a terminal illness like mine can very easily push you towards grieving the past and fearfully awaiting the gloomy future. I believe I was able to a large extent with the help of Allah and my wife‘s encouragement and support to enjoy my NOW moments as much as I can.
Summer 2018. Now, it‘s one year into my ALS diagnosis as well as into my AUC The American University in Cairo career path. Broadly speaking, I am physically fit for most activities still. However, I am in a denial phase that I refuse to admit. I can’t (or more accurately don‘t want) to project the expected symptoms onto myself, and prefer to shun away any of these horrifying ideas. My wife, however, being in a different situation than mine can see it coming and tries to encourage me to cherish our moments as a family together and enjoy what we still have while it lasts. One way to do that in her point of view was traveling. That summer we had plans for two consecutive trips. I already had been accepted at a conference in Seville, %Spain, and so we decide to travel together to attend the conference and enjoy the Andalucian vibes. Joined by my sister-in-law, we spend wonderful time in Andalucia and then Barcelona. Moreover, we arranged for another trip upon our return to Turkey with our kids. Throughout the span of a little less than two weeks, we traveled across three wonderful cities in Turkey (Istanbul, Kapadokya, and Oludeniz), and had such an awesome time with our kids. Plus, I enjoyed first-hand the amazing experience of paragliding along with my elder son above the Mediterranean (despite me being a bit fearful of heights). At any rate, it was an amazing holiday for the four of us not really knowing that it would technically also be also our last one!
Major Takeaway
In facing such a terminal and fatal disease, it was very easy for my wife and myself to surrender and let ALS take over our lives driving us both into a depressing state. We willingly refused to do so! This is not to say that we conquered every moment and had a rosy ride. We definitely went through our low points so many times! Had it not been for Allah’s blessings, a supportive family, and amazing friends (like true gems!), we would not have been able to push through this tough but rewarding journey. And remember always it’s all about the MINDSET!